The Wedding Custom Called The Crying Song

There are many wedding traditions that are hard on the bride and sometimes, the entire family is swept up into these traditions. Some of these customs are very difficult and some are easy but I think that they should all be easy. When you think about it, wedding are hard enough to prepare for without going through all of these weird traditions that our ancient families made up so that they would have something to laugh about in the afterlife as they watch us running around down here trying to fulfill all of these idiocies. If you ask me, the hardest part about a wedding ceremony should be signing the wedding guest book with the wedding pen. At least most of us do not live in China and are not part of the Tujia peoples.

This ancient tribe of people has a custom that dates back to their ancestor’s, ancestors, ancestors. It is called the crying tradition by outsiders because it involves a lot of crying. To the naked eye, it is just a bunch of people sitting around crying. But if you look closer and listen, you realize that there is a richness and meaning to this custom that is very interesting and thousands of years of customs blended together to make it more unique with each passing generation.

A month before she is to wed, a bride begins to weep. Their weddings revolve around the cycle of the moon so she know precisely when to start. She does not walk around sobbing uncontrollably; she will sit in a designated place alone and for an hour or two every day and weep. Woven into her weeping is a harmony, words, and symbols of words, small singsong phrases that can be picked up by the trained ear. At first, you think it is sad. But after a few weeks of this, you begin to realize that there is a huge range of emotions involved that include sorrow, joy, contentment, hope, loss, and gain, among others yet they are all wound up in a sadness that can only be expressed when crying.

Ten days after she starts this ritual, her mother joins her in her weeping place, which is sometimes a special tent that is set off to the side of the main village. They will cry together from now on. They cry on different notes and have a nice complexity in their rhythms that compliment one another. They sound mournful and yet there is something else behind it. Mother and daughter will cry for an hour or two every day for ten days at which time they will be joined by the rest of the females in her family. They will all cry together until the wedding day.

Now we realize what the meaning behind this wonderful tradition really is. This is the women’s way of ensuring a happy and prosperous marriage. According to their beliefs, and these beliefs are not that much different from many other cultures in the world, there are evil spirits that are jealous of a man and wife starting a life that the spirits, who are dead, can never have. These spirits try to jinx and damage the relationships that we, as humans, form with one another, in particular, love, and weddings. The women cry sorrowfully so that they can beat these evil spirits at their own game.

The premise is a simple one. They cry and weep sorrowfully so the evil spirits think they have succeeded. However, the women are crying about joyful and happy things. They cry for the marriage to be blessed. They cry for the marriage to be prosperous, and they cry for the couple to be happy and have many children together. They fool the spirits by crying prayerfully and they bless the union.

When the entire family of females gets together and harmonizes, their crying it is one of the most beautiful sounds in the world and often the entire tribe will be very quiet at this time so that they can hear what they call “The Crying Song.

Aaron Hu has authored on an extensive range of topics related to the wedding industry. If you are looking for Wedding guest book, E-WeddingFavors.com has the biggest selection available. You will also find Wedding Party Favors and much more, all at very affordable prices.

Wedding Speeches Unplugged

There are certain unspoken rules when it comes to weddings that should be adhered to even though they are not written in stone. Among these unwritten rules of etiquette are the courtesies of speeches and toasts. If you follow these rules, and pass them on to the other toasters and well wishers, your wedding reception should go as planned and not run too long or too short. It will also reduce the amount of the goofs and surprises that almost always accompanies these types of events.

As a general rule, there are three oral speeches and an unspecified amount of toasts with comments. There is a huge difference between the two. The three main speeches are accompanied by a toast however, they are usually about five minutes in length and are given by the brides doting father, the happy groom, and the jealous best man. The bride’s father should cover some topics that are not listed in any particular order except the first one, which would only be natural. First, the proud pop should thank the guests for attending and supporting their family on this, one of the happiest days of their lives. Note here that he should thank them as a group because thanking two hundred guests in a toast speech would take seven minutes and thirty-two seconds if my stopwatch were working correctly. The doting dad would also welcome his new son-in-law to the family. Hopefully, he would not mention in front of everyone his secret desire to drag him out into the street and kick his tushy all the way to–leave my daughter alone–ville. (Population, every male on the planet)

The frank father should tell a few funny if not slightly embarrassing stories of his little girl when she was a child or perhaps a short timeline of how she has grown into a woman. It is absolutely vital that he include his wife, her mother, in one or two of the sentences so that no one thinks he is ignoring her. Perhaps mentioning how proud he is of the woman his daughter has become and then giving all of the credit for that to her mother would keep him out of the doghouse for the night. The hardest part of his speech should include some intelligent words of worldly wisdom that can carry the young couple through their life as a kind of mantra or code to live by, at least until the end of the week. The father should then toast the couple, tapping on his glass a second time to wake the guests or drag them away from studying, with avid interest, their golf wedding favors and beach wedding favors so they can raise their glasses.

The groom should then give a speech, immediately thanking his new father-in-law for not going over an hour with his speech. Trying not to leer, he should thank him and his mother-in-law for giving him their daughter. And it is customary that he toast the bridesmaids as well, again, trying not to leer. The grooms toast should include a thank you to the guests but also a special shout out to the best man for not succeeding in talking him out of going through with it. At that point, he passes the toast over to the best man and then passes out for a quick and sobering nap.

The best man’s toast is the most important of them all and is probably the most difficult. Anyone who has ever seen a “My best friend is getting married” movie knows that the best man is more than likely so drunk by now that his lips are numb and the odds of anything intelligible coming from them are pretty astronomical. For this reason, he should keep his toast speech short and try to refrain from sloshing his drink all over the bride as he waves it around. He is also obligated to cry and whine in a nostalgic, I’ll miss you man fashion that will be hard for anyone to watch. At the end of this toast, the best man and the groom should stand and hold each other, sobbing uncontrollably. You do not have to follow these guidelines to the letter but it is a pretty close description of speech etiquette at a traditional wedding ceremony.

Aaron Hu has authored on an extensive range of topics related to the wedding industry. If you are looking for beach wedding favors, E-WeddingFavors.com has the biggest selection available. You will also find Wedding Guest Favors and much more, all at very affordable prices.

The Grammar Police Will Get You

How do you say “2010″?

Coming off of “two thousand nine,” you’ll probably say “two thousand ten.” In fact, 4 out of 5 YouTube videos randomly reviewed by The Chronicle have people pronouncing it that way.

But you would be wrong, so wrong, according to the National Association of Good Grammar.

“NAGG has decided to step in and decree that (2010) should officially be pronounced ‘twenty ten,’ and all subsequent years should be pronounced as ‘twenty eleven,’ ‘twenty twelve,’ etc.,” proclaims the association’s news release.

The National Association of Good Grammar – essentially a guy named Tom Torriglia and some friends who also paid attention in English class – say people have been mispronouncing the year for 10 years.

“NAGG is here to put everybody back on the correct path,” Torriglia said by phone from his home in San Francisco. “We lost the battle when we went from 1999 to 2000 – but now we’re hoping to win the war.”

The “20″ should have been pronounced “twenty” all along, he said, pointing out that every year in the 20th century was pronounced “nineteen something.”

” ‘Twenty’ follows ‘nineteen.’ ‘Two thousand’ does not follow ‘nineteen.’ It’s logical.”

Fighting for grammar

Companies pay Torriglia, who has written technical manuals for two decades, to be logical and clear in explaining the least clear concepts, like how to use their own computer software. He’s also taught writing to aspiring technical writers and to junior college students.

Torriglia created NAGG in 1986 when he found himself calling publications about their grammatically incorrect ads.

“I would nag them,” he said.

Torriglia, who is writing a book he calls “The Grammar Police Never Sleep,” believes the time has come to nag again.

To punctuate the idea that “two thousand ten” is the wrong way to say it, Torriglia, 56, pointed out that no one would ever say, “I was born in one thousand nine hundred and fifty-three.”

Yet that’s how people keep saying “2010.” In one YouTube video, a preteen promises to make more YouTube videos in “two thousand ten.” Another has a guy on a yellow dirt bike saying he’s “amped about the all-new ‘two thousand ten’ ” model. A third features people trying to design novelty eyeglasses in the shape of “two thousand ten.”

To Torriglia, it’s relentless.

“I’m hearing it on TV commercials. I heard an announcer say it during ‘Monday Night Football.’ You cringe.”

Torriglia cringes, anyway. But he’s the kind of guy who cringes at the Safeway checkout line where the sign reads “10 items or less.”

“It should be fewer.”

He’s right.

Maybe not

But what choice did anyone really have this past decade? Were they going to start off the new millennium with a “twenty oh oh” hiccup, while avoiding the melodious “two thousand”?

There’s a reason Arthur C. Clarke didn’t call his book “Twenty Oh One: A Space Odyssey.”

It’s been a difficult decade for Torriglia, phonologically speaking.

“It was never ‘two thousand nine’ for me,” he sighed. “It was always ‘twenty aught nine.’ “

So the people hawking next year’s car models, the newscasters on TV and anyone else with a reason to say “2010″ aloud should embrace good grammar and say “twenty ten” right now, Torriglia said.

Not exactly, according to noted linguistics Professor George Lakoff of UC Berkeley.

“It’s not wrong to say ‘two thousand ten,’ ” Lakoff said. “And it’s not like ‘twenty ten’ is the right way.”

His explanation involves cognitive reference points, standards of speech and recognizing as anachronistic the notion that grammar can be right or wrong as people and cultures evolve.

Nevertheless, Lakoff predicted, ” ‘Twenty-ten’ is gonna take over. It’s shortest. It’s easiest to understand.”

On that point – if not on the syntax – the master linguist and the grammar police agree.

Funny Best Man Wedding Speeches Done Right

As the best man at a wedding, you might find it easier to give a funny speech than a sentimental one. If funny is more your personality, take a look at this funny best man speech example below. The best man in the video appropriately mixes humor with good taste.

He gets kudos for:

  • Memorizing his speech.
  • Paying compliments to the bride.
  • Not embarrassing the groom with any embarrassing locker room humor.
  • Giving a nice toast at the end.
  • Speaking directly to the bride and groom.
  • Being engaging and interesting.

A good place to scour the net for free funny best man speeches is Youtube. You can get plenty of ideas of how to deliver some pretty funny best man wedding speeches. The better speeches are ones in which the best man has taken his speech seriously and prepared it well in advance.

If you need a little extra help with the wording and how to write witty, funny best man wedding speeches, you might want to check out the handy-dandy guide below.  In it you will get:

  • twenty best man speech examples that you can customize to suit your needs.
  • some pretty in-depth information on how to tickle your audiences funny bones
  • how to use emotion without sounding too corny
  • detailed do’s and don’ts to prevent any slip-ups during your delivery
  • information on speech, toasting, and general wedding etiquette
  • and useful tips on speech delivery (including some pretty effective stuff on how to get rid of stage-fright and not feel like throwing up).

Product ImageIn short: whatever you need to pull off your a funny best man wedding speech that everyone will remember (and you can put on Youtube) are included in this guide.

But don’t take my word for it: check it out for yourself (and peruse a couple of those testimonials while you’re there – if they don’t convince you, then nothing will!)

Nifty Little Toast Generator

As I was surfing today, I came across this tool on blissweddings.com. It’s a down and dirty toast generator. It doesn’t come up with anything profound or sentimental, but it may be enough to get you jumpstarted on writing an amazing wedding speech.

Here is the toast it generated for me in a span of 15 seconds…

A Wedding Toast to Julia and Derek

Excuse me. Would anybody mind if I took this time to wish Julia and Derek a happy half hour anniversary?(Laughter, applause) I would like to say thank you to Mr. and Mrs. Jones for all that you’ve done to make this the special day that it is. And, of course, my gratitude to Mr. and Mrs. Smith for all of your support and all that you’ve done to make this, by all accounts, the perfect day. And finally, thank you, Derek for making such a good choice for the best man.

This morning when Derek and I were getting ready, he turned to me and asked “Is everything okay?” I don’t mind telling you that I was taken aback by this. In all the years that I’ve known him, that’s the first time he’s expressed any interest in my well-being. Oh sure, he’s talked to me before, but it’s usually, “Pass the chips”, or “Don’t stand in front of the TV”, or “Did you pick up the beer?” This morning he wanted to know if I’m okay? I blame Julia for this sudden surge in sentimentality. Now Derek is caring, he’s generous, he’s sensitive. I don’t even know him anymore. Julia has changed my best friend. Actually, I should thank you Julia. You’ve done in (8) months, what I couldn’t do in (8) years.

Here’s to Julia and Derek, a life of years, free of tears, bottoms up and lots of luck.

10 Inspirational Wedding Quotes to Borrow

“Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.”
-Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get.
Only with what you are expecting to give, which is everything.”
- Katharine Hepburn

“Work like you don’t need the money, love like you’ve never been hurt, dance like no one is watching.”
- Kathy Mattea

“Joy has no cost.”
- Marianne Williamson

“Marriage is not a ritual or an end. It is a long, intricate, intimate dance together, and nothing matters more than your own sense of balance and your choice or partner.”
- Amy Bloom

“To improve is to change; to be perfect is to change often.”
- Winston Churchill

“To love someone deeply gives you strength. Being loved by someone deeply gives you courage.”
- Lao Tzu

“The goal of marriage is to give the best years of your life to the spouse who makes them the best years of your life.”
- Anonymous

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, and penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.”
- Maya Angelou

“We are shaped and fashioned by what we love.”
- Johann Wofgang van Goethe

For more ideas on writing wedding speeches, we suggest this wedding speech guide.